Some people are naturally happy alone. From the onset, be keen on the use of ‘alone’ rather than ‘lonely’ since they underline different ramifications. There are two types of people in the world: those who are happy alone, and those who need some company no matter what. I’ve always wondered if the happy loners ever say “for better or for worse” to their life partners. I hope so! On the other hand, there are people who can’t exist solo. Let me categorically state that some company is necessary, whether you’re a happy loner or not. Human beings are social creatures, after all.
Can a person be happy alone?
This is a question that has been debated by thinkers for centuries, with no clear consensus. The happy loner does not necessarily enjoy being alone all the time – they just don’t feel the need to be constantly surrounded by other people in order to feel happy. In fact, happy loners often enjoy periods of solitude in order to recharge and rejuvenate. Building a relationship with yourself is highly recommended. You might as well enjoy while at it!
Traditionally, spending a lifetime alone led to mixed reactions. Having a partner meant financial security, upholding nuclear family aspirations, and offsetting some gender inequalities. However, times have changed. You no longer need social validations to enjoy a fulfilling life. Unfortunately, even in this century, being alone carries a serious stigma in some societies. Spending time alone doesn’t indicate any default. No one should try to tell you otherwise. Media influences, fear of the unknown, and family pressure among other flimsy reasons should not push you into unhappy relationships. It says more about your personality and resilience by overcoming such pressure and being happy alone.
10 Proven Ways: Beginner’s guide to being happy alone
1.Start by accepting yourself
Embrace your quirks and imperfections. Appreciate your company. Love what makes you unique, whole and imperfect. That’s just what life is made up of. At the end of the day, there’s only you.
2.Find joy in the simple things in life
Take time to smell the roses, as they say. The little things matter more than you think. Life is too short to sweat the small stuff, after all. When I was a young girl, there was this priest who taught us to remember to remain thankful when things work in our favor; even once in a week. In a deep voice, he said “Some people never get that much.” It took lots of years to figure out what he meant but this point alludes to the need to appreciate even the smallest things in life.
3.Don’t be afraid to reach out and build meaningful relationships with others
Just because you’re happy alone doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the company of others from time to time. Spend time with those who sincerely love and care about your overall well-being. These are your shelter in a time of storm.
4.Take a break from social media
The more social media tools are invented; the lesser the social capital. Social feeds don’t tell or determine your existence. Not by a mile. Let go and live. By now, I hope you’ve realized that even the so-called celebs are imperfect; like you and I. Wean off social media gradually, and then adopt a strict timeline moving forward. If you’re forever scrolling on your phone, you could be robbing yourself an opportunity to live and enjoy fully. Well, for starters, phones are a great way to cultivate communal ties. However, some people spend tens of hours glued to their devices as a way of avoiding confronting their true feelings. Next time you feel lonely, tuck your phone away and reconnect with your conscience. If unsure of what to do during this time, take a pen and write some of the things you could enjoy in the future.
5.Let your mind wander
Occasionally, enjoy the tranquillity of your company. Switch off television, radio, phone, and internet and be alone. Allow your mind to roam freely and see where that takes you. If you find such an activity hectic, you can engage in repetitive tasks such as knitting, washing, etc. At first, it may not go far but the mind will embrace the new freedom with time.
6.Strengthen your coping skills
I recall dealing with the loss of a loved one. The impact was devastating. Some days, I couldn’t even dare to wake up. All I wanted is to be alone. Dwelling on the best moments, talking to a counsellor and urged on by family and friends, I pushed myself to the extremes. Of course, I lost the battle some days. One of the best lessons from the experience is the resilience and inbuilt grit developed. Life will always throw issues at you but withdrawal makes everything worse. Therefore, cultivate your coping skills and this reduces the need to be alone.
7.Go out on a date
Yes, put maximum effort into impressing you. Order a delicious meal, and an exquisite glass of wine, and breathe. Sounds fancy? Start with a simple date at a coffee shop. Prioritize self-care since there can only be one you. No pressure.
8.Get physical
since exercises help in the release of endorphins, the neurotransmitters that make one feel happier.
9.Connect with nature
Treasure the therapeutic value of feeling the breeze on your face.
10.Be optimistic
A leading cause of depression and suicide is feelings of desolation and helplessness. Tough times don’t last but tough people do. You should remember to look forward to the sunrise. Eventually, it will come with better tidings.
Benefits of being alone
I’ve to emphasize that spending time alone should not cause feelings of guilt or anxiety. Here are a few benefits to increase your resolve for some alone time.
1.Perks of being alone
With a measure of responsibility, not being answerable is comforting. A time when you’re free from worrying over everyone else but you. Take up all the bed space, go all out in the kitchen and spoil yourself with a good meal, and dance to your favorite music. Be lazy and not condemned for it. That’s simply refreshing.
2.Cultivates resilience
Life is messy. Delight in the times when you conquered bad times. Be grateful and replenish your soul for future temptest. No one denies that future turmoil await. Take some credit for your exploits and look forward to the future with renewed optimism and strength.
3.Build Relationships
Ironic, huh?
On the contrary, you cannot offer what you don’t own. Durable relationships are an outcome of being comfortable with one’s personality which is extended to others.
Meditate on these life-changing quotes
Here are some profound life-changing quotes to jolt you into reality whenever faced by loneliness. Powerful, relevant and everyday quotes to mold your life perspective, and when in need of a push.
10 powerful quotes on being alone
- Nothing can bring you peace but yourself. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
- The sun is alone too. And he’s still shining.
- Loneliness expresses the pain of being alone and solitude expresses the glory of being alone. – Paul Tillich
- The soul that sees beauty may sometimes walk alone.
- We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone. – Orson Welles
- If you want to be happy, learn to be alone without being lonely. Learn that being alone does not mean being unhappy. The world is full of plenty of interesting and enjoyable things to do and people who can enrich your life. – Michael Josephson
- Truth is, I’m generally happiest when it’s just me. It’s okay to be madly in love with yourself. – Richelle E. Goodrich
- A season of loneliness and isolation is when the caterpillar gets its wings. Remember that next time you feel alone. — Mandy Hale
- People think being alone makes you lonely, but I don’t think that’s true. Being surrounded by the wrong people is the loneliest thing in the world. ― Kim Culbertson
- Sometimes you need to take a break from everyone and spend time alone to experience, appreciate, and love yourself. – Robert Tew
Alone; not lonely
As human beings, investing in platonic relationships is essential for better mental health and leading fulfilling lives. Call on other people, buy a pet, or volunteer in community activities. Spend time with loved ones; I insist.
Reach out for help
In case you’re dealing with feelings of anxiety, stress, and depression, reach out to health practitioners and counselors. No amount of alone time can cure loneliness and sadness. Suicide and drug abuse make everything worse.
Be happy alone but not lonely.
